The Cost of Education...

I have been researching grants and scholarships.....and that has been something of a disappointment. I'm either too old, too far into my schooling or not from a particular high school or whatever....the field has been narrowed dramatically as to what I can even apply for. Add this to the fact that somewhere around 80% of any extra money for school I can get that isn't loans, involves entering one competition or another, which of course costs money to even try, with no guarantee that the juror will even have a clue as to what your artistic vision is...such is the subjective nature of art or photography competitions. So I have managed to squirrel away $10 for the WPGA (World Photography Gala Awards/3 pieces). Now the trick is saving $35-45 x3 or 4 for a few other shows out of a budget that already has us eating food that is horrible for us, because it's what we can afford and stave off hunger. Despite the fact that my wife could make cardboard taste good.....fatty foods and huge carbs is probably not so good for us when we want to lose weight...I suppose we could go without food completely for a month or so, or just eat white rice and ramen.....yea like that will happen. I suppose I will have to be judicious and set some money aside from the fall and next spring for the next round of shows.....the more I get in the better it looks for my committee when they review my work and effort. I am really enjoying the vortography aspect of my work and plan doing a series or two in the studio this fall with it, so I will have some awesome stuff to submit for some of these events I'm sure. I'm also going to speak with the Sculpture teacher who works in iron and aluminum and see whether we can come up with a device to house the mirrors properly, with handles and caps even to protect the mirrors from accidental damage. I hope there is something we can come up with between or after classes as I am not taking any sculpture classes. Also trying to decide if a Grad student counts as being a student or a professional....usually a BFA pushes you into that pro category, but I have yet to sell more than one or two pieces every couple of years. Still learning the ins and outs of Plug-In suite 5.1, but so far I think it has been worth the money.

RTist A Marketplace For Artists and Art Connoisseurs

RTist A Marketplace For Artists and Art Connoisseurs

Ups, Downs and Everything Between

well...life is, as usual, interesting (the type of interesting one hears about in Chinese proverbs or fortune cookies. Fun, fun...I failed to secure a spot in the Smoky Hill show, that was disappointing, however I did manage to get "Sadness" into the Sandzen Collegiate show in Lindsborg....very cool, now we just have to figure out how to get it there and try and get money to go to the opening if we can...probably won't be able to do more than ship it and provide return shipping however. My daughter will be getting moved to a school to handle special needs kids because she keeps having potentially dangerous outbursts in class, this will likely devastate her, especially as her friends will be staying where they are. She will likely have to attend this school through the summer to help her learn to control herself enough to mainstreamed back into regular school. This doesn't mean she isn't capable, just hard to deal with. We continue to tell her she is smart (she is), and that she'll learn to control her impulses better (hopeful). I haven't heard from Lines yet...fingers crossed, or the IPA and Photographers Forum for the Spring contest, we'll see what happens, August is usually when we hear from them. Grad Review is on the 16th of this month. 20 Photographs, 10 Digital/Multimedia Comps and 5 Drawings as well as a power point presentation. Then the usual grind until the end of semester when my paper and presentation needs to be finished. Discovering the "lost" art of Vortography has been amusing and exciting, hard to believe there hasn't been more exploration of it. I can only imagine what I will be able to do when I have my Macro and an IR Filter.....*sigh*. I continue to look for more ideas/compositions to use with this technique, but it helps me to use my camera to create some very interesting abstract images. Here's hoping we make it through the summer intact and into the fall.

Yay!!!!

Loneliness was chosen as a finalist in the Photographer's forum, this makes four of my pics to make it into their competition over the past couple of years. This thrills me to no end, shows I have consistently good images, not just by my standards. It would be nice to win even 4th place this year though as we could use the money and being placed in Nikon's emerging photographers hall of fame would be so awesome. I must be improving somewhat as I actually placed second with this photo in the five state, in the people category, not one of my stronger areas, but one I keep striving to work on. Grad school is somewhat intimidating, I go for my initial review after this semester and they will determine if I stay or go. Part of my thesis is to design and print 27 catalogs for the faculty and Graduate school, likely wind up printing 30 or so just to even up the printing and cutting order. That is going to be slightly expensive, as will setting up my thesis show, but I have until Spring 2012 to do that...*phew*...

I have a better show record than most of my fellow students, and others who have graduated with their masters, so I hope that indicates my work is sufficiently good enough quality to mean continued progress. I am shooting lots of sports and other events this semester so I should get the opportunity to capture some interesting things, and I am looking forward to getting into the studio to take some abstract or still life shots and maybe some portraiture. my plug-in software should get here in a day or so and I am looking forward to playing with that.

Patience

We are underway.....while I get the opportunity to work with the campus photographer and get more experience, the opportunities will be slim, so they need to use me for graphics and grunt media work as well to fill up my work study. We will be getting less than we had anticipated from our tax returns as our new windows only cont in removing taxes paid, which we don't have at the moment. So re-adjusting there is in order. Fighting more with my depression, just can't seem to wrestle it under control lately like I have been, and my blood glucose keeps spiking, so I'm trying to cut back on my calorie intake to lose more weight, which likely contributes. I have to meet with my drawing professor and my photography professor on Mondays to discuss my direction and show work accomplished in the drawing aspect. Art History is M/W/F, with a 1 hour meeting early on Tuesday mornings and Digital media runs 3:30-6:20 on Tuesday and Thursday, which is sorta fun as I am learning some animation, but the three hour class is tiring. that leaves me some room to work while I'm on campus.....and read when I'm not working, this is because I don't want my wife to waste gas coming to get me mid day, I can manage being on campus all day and then come home. I shot the Women and Men Basketball games and Mitch was happy with my first effort, not much in the way of advice on how to improve, just to remember to get as close as you can. I go out to shoot the MLK candlelight ceremony on Monday, then I'll see what other work they have for me....I hope there is plenty to do, and I'll be doing lots of after hour shoots, so I'll be getting home later than usual, and my social life will be non-existent (like I had much of one to begin). I'll be submitting to a couple of shows this year, and the photographers forum as well, but the student honors show is beyond my grasp now, only undergrads can enter. I have sent something to our on campus publication, Lines, and to the McNeese exhibition, now comes the waiting. There will be fewer opportunities to take classes in the summer, so I'll have to get a job either working for a photographer in town, or at one of the retail stores around here (retail is the most likely). I was contemplating doing my paper for art history on the development of photography as both art and otherwise through the two world wars. I'll have to see what material they have on it, failing that I'll probably write on Margaret Bourke White during the 40's, or one of the many other photography pioneers. I'll need lots of patience....especially as all I want to do right now is scream and go running off into the ether...I want this to be done, and yet I feel like this is the only way I'll be able to get to a point to really make something for my family, despite the mounting debt.I have to budget some equipment into the next few semesters aid, software is included in this.....still waiting for my Plug-in suite 5 to process and ship...that's frustrating as well. IR filter is one of my wish list items, a combat style d-ring strap (so I can wear the camera slung rather than around my neck), one of those periscope style eyepiece devices as getting very low to the ground is easy, its the getting up that is hard (knees are pretty messed up). Lenses would be nice, but they'll come in time starting with a macro, then a wide angle then a good telephoto. Well I'll stop rambling now....I think maybe I've vented enough so that I won't implode or something. I know not everyone reads this journal, and I kind of double post on my other two journals......maybe I should just keep updating all three.

Tis the Season

Solstice/Yule went without much issue, I smudged the house to chase away any remnants of negative energy of the previous year. Now its just being patient and seeing through the traditional observances of the season. I'm completely exhausted and yet exhilarated, the new year promises to be a decent one in so far as finding myself artistically and possibly even spiritually to a degree, there's always room for more positive growth. I have officially graduated, the ceremony is in May however, but I finished with a 3.62 GPA which means I get honors on my diploma, that excites me, growing up feeling I was stupid. I still fight with that nasty voice that likes to point out my failings, despite the fact that I am more than capable. We may or may not spend Christmas with family this year, bad weather and illness seem to be conspiring to keep us at home by ourselves this year, perhaps fate is trying to teach us to learn to be self reliant....still sucks for Rhiannon, who hurts and is now looking at missing her Christmas with grandma. So no I have to apply for my license which should be a formality, and I will officially be a teacher.....not so sure where I'm going to get my mentor ship year done with..or when. Anyway, such is life, best wishes to all in the new year.

Year's End

The year is coming to it's inevitable conclusion, I have been selected as one of 172 entries to be exhibited at the Five State Photo Exhibition, this is out of 489 applicants. I have seven days left of student teaching with only my final reflection needing to be turned in (this will be done shortly). I have no idea how well I have been doing save for the occasional comment from my sponsors and my advisor. The grade itself is something I will likely not see until after the class is done by a week or so. If I get an A....great, my GPA goes up to a 3.6+ for graduation, otherwise I'll probably pass ok. Been feeling kinda yuck lately....hard to describe it as anything else other than yuck. That voice in the back of your head that trash talks you, some people may not be aware of this creature, but many of us know who it is. Well, he's been tossing nasty comments my way, trying to weaken my self-confidence. Then there is the soreness in parts of my body that just won't go away, the right elbow to be more precise, which makes doing what I enjoy very difficult indeed. Suffer for thine work.....I know, I know....I'm just hoping it will all work itself out over time. The financial burdens, graduate school, working to become a "master photographer" and have it actually mean something more than just a diploma with my name on it. Anyway, we'll see what the next section of our journey has in store for us, more time for me to practice both drawing and painting and photography, Photoshop and Indesign. Looking at a two year membership to NAPP (National Association of Photoshop Professionals), getting more gear to help me do some amazing things, hopefully.....we'll see.